They Never Meant to Rain

🌧️ Before the Rain – A Moment

It was around 05:00 O'clock .
My exam had just ended, and the weather outside was teasing—windy, heavy, and full of clouds. I was waiting for rain.
Not just water-from-the-sky rain, but a kind of relief, a soft release from everything inside me.

But it didn’t come.

I got on the bus, reached my stop, and still—no rain.
With my bag weighed down by books, a few personal things, and my diary that holds more than pages ever could... I kept walking.

Two boys raised their hands to stop the bus at a non-designated stop. I pointed them to the actual one, only to be met with unnecessary ego. That moment stung more than it should have. My mood sank.

I had left my umbrella at home, almost on purpose—like I wanted to be caught in the rain, fully.
But it still wouldn’t rain.

Instead of going home directly, I took the longer way.
My steps slowed down. The sky was on the edge of something.
The wind kept pushing my hair to the left, whispering things that didn’t have words.

I reached home.
Still dry. Still waiting.

I went to the rooftop. And that’s where it ended.

That’s where the poem begins.

It never meant to rain.
The loud voice inside me
Was screaming toward the clouds—
Their destiny written,
But none for me.

It hovered above me,
Like an umbrella half-opened—
There, yet never mine.

The dark wasn’t ordinary.
It carried a sensation—
Like time had quickened,
But stumbled in glitches between seconds.

Why is everything in a hurry?
What are they afraid of?

It never meant to rain.

Buildings are losing their color.
Trees fading without protest.
Birds, tired, looking for shade.

It feels like I am the earth—
All of me, waiting
For them to rain.

Believe me or not,
They never meant to rain.

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